I am convinced, as a tad bit arrogant this may sound, that ASASI UM is the most flexible Malaysian Matriculation/Foundation program there is yet. I am therefore very grateful that I have been blessed with such a privilege. I shall study even harder now. For the remaining three weeks.

No curfews, location very pretty close to plenty of accomodations vital for teenage satisfaction, the University complex is beautiful, students are better entitled to their state of minds, status quos are lived up to but with absolutely no discrimination whatsoever, exam papers prepared by our own lecturers, the biggest lecture hall in the whole of UM (bio students je, padan muke physicals dapat lecture hall kecik! haha...no offence), the view during morning walks to class is actually very scenic, 11th College being a small residential college so the chances of bumping into lots of people at a time and mingling are favourable, inter-gender interaction restrictions are left for the students' understanding and responsibilities (I am in favour of the independence of one's acceptance of what's right and wrong), screw banning cars anyone can bring in their rides, there're hardly real-ass spotchecks of the rooms, the washing machine being right outside my room, new residential buildings, lecturers who respect students like deserved adults, pretty flexible class hours...

I have fallen absolutely in love with UM okay, it will be a tragedy leaving it probably for good in three Goddarned weeks...

Although rather contradictory to the previous post, I pay more attention to what my mind yearns to speak out rather than it's instant momentary consequences...this may be a temporary statement, one of those things that run through your head that might be obsolete the very next day.

-Oh and don't mind my not the most simple vocabulary, I'm reading the bigass Campbell~Reece Biology text book. Lol. Imagine sentences like "In the wake of this advancing wave of RNA synthesis, the new RNA molecule peels away.....", "Molecular biologists cracked the code of life in th early 1960s, when a series of elegant experiments disclosed the amino acid translations of each of the RNA codons...", ...I could never resist at grinning at certain parts like these in an advanced biology text. I mean, how at almost every end of a shocking discovery stated there will be a phrase of an anology or so over-articulating the significance of little known facts. It's like, a more sophisticated way of say "OMG, IT'S LIKE FRIGGIN' COOL HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE THIS" kind of thing. It's quite amusing, okay, haha. "The intron RNA functions as a ribozyme and catalyses its own excision!".....I find the hyperbolic usage of the exclamation mark there very amusing too...XD

It really does help me love biology even more. Despite having to read a LOT. I love genetics. It's hard, but I love it. When I come to each point where I understand very complex mechanisms...I restrain myself from giving myself a standing ovation...

ANYWAY...where were we. Okay, science aside that is, let's scrutinise a bit my character in history (my blog, okay, so I'd like to talk about myself sometimes, lol, stay with me). Like a DNA helix structure, there are 2 strands of me. A template, and a complementary strand. My template strand homes the basic defintion of myself, nowadays advancing in terms of being very bubbly and vibrant even at times when everyones supposed to be uptight about something, one with obvious sarcasm issues ;P, one who thinks her midgetness is COOL despite ten thousand people seeming to absolutely LOVE taking a mick out of me about it, one who has a considerably sufficient amount of pride for such a person where my petiteness is a significance not necessarily accenting anything history-worthy, haha...and the likes. The other part of me, complementingly, is more reserved and sensible. Sometimes annoyingly so. It is annoying when I seek comfort from this side of me at times when the crowd beckons. But nevertheless, this side puts forth a reason why I never tolerate underestimation...

This part sees myself as the self-acclaimed shakespearette although some might disagree in terms of I shouldn't be so braggy suke-suke nak mengaku diri sendiri shakespearette konn, kan...lol. But anyhow, a person who unlike many of her peers, enjoys watching historical war epics over and over again rather than schmaltzy love flicks that I don't even want to relate to. A person who used to love reading stuff by Homer and whatnots, one with an impressive knowledge of the House of Tudor and Henry VIII's allies in announcing Protestantism. The person who used to go to the library borrowing Usborne publications of Britain's Hauntings and the History of Decapitation and what nots. A person who was so determine to extract a captivating phrase from Shakespeare's Julius Caesar that was definitely less common than "Friends, Romans, countrymen...blabla (i don't remember any of it seriously,lol)." In the end this person found a phrase that sounded something like "In the eyes of both armies, I stand...(I also can't remember the rest)." for the opening line of her 2004 MGS vs St. Bernadette's debate that was even remembered by a sister of the opponent's speaker. I deem to make history like that. But never much through science.

So why the hell am I not studying journalism or history or something...

When I told Mum some months ago, I might want to become a historian living in Florence...and she said, "What for...everything's been discovered...the biggest of history have already taken place...you can find everything in the books."

Then I pondered to myself...that was what Nebuchednezzar of Persia probably thought when he proclaimed himself the God-King with a massive empire of 'worshippers'...history never stops.

But my future is what my present prophecises. Science. Learning science still has taught me that this field is not one that time is very considerate with. I never have the time to sit down and read Illiad anymore. I never have time to surf Wikipedia for hours studying The Knights Templar and the Kingdom of Heaven, for general knowledge's sakes. I never get to have small debates on world politics or human rights and third-world country issues (heck I don't even know what's going on in the world anymore these days, buying the newspaper everyday is not exactly walking distance-simple anymore). Instead of broadening my persective with global knowledge it almos seems like I'm having to constrict my knowledge range smaller and smaller and smaller....from learning about organelles in form 4 I delve deeper into learning about the molecular structure of genes...from learning about thermochemical reactions in form 5 I dig deeper still into the beyond microscopic world of crystallines and photons......total opposite of expansion. It's just a metaphoric way of seeing it, I know, but still, there are tons more things that I'd rather be learning about than this.

Sometimes I sit and stare long and hard into space thinking of the possibilities that were in better reach before I came here months ago. But then again at the very end of the day, I know I love it her, and I supposed I don't only have an upperhand at life opportunities later on...but lots. I can still write when I become a succesful vet one day (Godwillingly), and still write verses and maybe even a book.

But I could never go back and study biology that I so love when if I was to do something artistic.........that would be just ridiculous. =)

i will update this weekend okay? stupid finals...it's only been the second frikkin day! today was okay though if anybody cares...Chem IV...yesterday was pure torture...stats and probability. i loathe. thank God over and done with...anywho, yes, THIS WEEKEND. tell loads...till then! ~

Mon Dieu! You are so kind! I HAVE GONE THROUGH ONE ENTIRE WEEK OF FINALS ALIVE!!!!!!!...........

Did I feel like I could win a lottery anytime with how I answered each paper IS ANOTHER UNEXCITING STORY....=)

Wednesday was Physiology of Organisms paper, not too bad, can-can...yesterday...yesterday was PhysicsIII...WORST PHYSICS PAPER TAKEN IN THE HISTORY OF PHYSICS PAPER-TAKING....!!!!

And mind you I have failed Physics once, only it was in form 5. Not proud of it but there you go. Could've done way better this time around if I had studied more but the horrid truth is...I am never insipired enough to reach for the sky when it's Physics. Everyone knows that. I'm such a broken record.

Today was Calculus and Algebra. I never have enough time for the maths papers these days. It reeks big time.

Anywho, so I practically stayed up the entire of last night...and slept at 5am...and woke up again at 6.20. I ought to be incredibly worn out by now which I certainly am even though I slept almost the whole of the afternoon off. Must be the entire week's payback.

Finals aside, I suppose everyone's secretly tensed about spending every significant minute wisely, all that's left of the one miserable week we have as of now. It was amazing actually, seeing how the past week itself left so quickly it was almost teasing.

.....................

On Wednesday, the girls and I left the exams' bulding and drove to Section14 for McDs. It was torturing, okay, waiting in the cold inside the hall for 11.30am to come and when it did I practically went  "Yes! Food!!" and beat everyone else to the car. It's the part where I finished my paper early due to a simple motivation, lol.

When we came back, Tasnim wanted to park her car at the swimming pool across the road. It was PACKED, and this other friend, Oje, was going round and round to find a space too before he decided to park at the end of this one row and we wanted to steal the space next to his so we waited as he reverse-parked his bigass Trajet....then he banged this Picanto behind. And it moved a bit. Us in the car were already having a gasping fit. After a bit, Afiq's car came round and wanted to take the space behind our still empty one...and he banged the Wira behind him..."OMG gile chain reaction weiii!..." and both came out of the car fine like it happens everyday -_-"...so when it came to Tasnim's turn to reverse-park her car she got all paranoid "This place is jinxed I shouldn't do this what if I bang into Afiq's car?!!?!"...and THEN...the ultimate moment...this guy who is the most resented person in the history of my current time now came out of Afiq's front passenger door as poserifically as ever...being oh-so-careful that his straight long tresses don't get devastated by the warm breeze that day, walked round the bonnet, and stood right in front of the car i.e. right behind Tasnim's very durable BMW. So whilst she was still making LOTS of noise about banging some random car I was all "Tasnimmm I don't care!! Reverse cepaaaaatttt langgar dieeeee!!!!!"

And I would've probably been so content inside if he was really hit and keep my innocence radiating...maybe I'll hire a bounty hunter or something. LOL.

...and then today, right after the math paper...Oje's car broke down in front of Dewan Tunku Canselor and we were like nooooo...who's gonna pick us up on Malam Emas now?? Him being super nice to his gilrfriend i.e. my bestfriend-roomate Naya means him wanting to be amazingly nice to me too doing all sorts of favours including telling off Mr. M-possible cum guy-who-almost-got-hit-by-Tasnim's-car for ever taking me for granted in the FIRST place...=). Sometimes I can't help at feeling bad for having to almost be the third wheel but the two of them include me in almost everything they do I couldn't turn down invites that often anymore...

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Anyway...we got our invitation cards, finally...

I bet when Dad get his he'll be calling me immediately just to tell me. I think he's more excited about being invited as part of the alumni then I am...one time, I was telling mum that I had to get a retro 60s Comeback kindaf outfit for Tika-boo's birthday....and he thought I was looking for my dinner dress and was all..."So...all the guests have to dress up...60's style?...What do I wear..."

Aiyo...father...hahaha.

Most of the guys I know are wearing white tuxes...and finding a white tux at student's price is...summin' else, LOL.

...it's like another reminder that we're going to be told to leave soon...

And flyers have been stuck on walls telling us that we have to clear out of the rooms and hand in our keys by the 23rd of April......so kejam...

There will be 8 cars convoying from the college but me and some of the girls were lucky enough to get a room at Legend Hotel absolutely free thanks to Tasnim's parents...and get a load of this...it's directly opposite Putra World Trade Centre, the venue. If someone would roll out a red carpet across the fastlane we'd just strut acrossthe road to the place...lol. The after-plan would be either Kembara-ing...which was a plan initially OURS, wanting to go driving around the city stopping at different random places in the dead of the night just hanging and spending the last bit of time together...8 cars...a whole load of even random-er people. Lol. BUT.....selfish Physical people went "mission hijacked!' Jahat... lol, whatever la, but still undecided.

THE NEXT DAY, IF DEE COULD GET FREE TICKETS WE WILL ALL BE GOING TO WATCH THE BY-INVITATION-ONLY GOOD CHARLOTTE SHOW AT BUKIT JALIL!!!!!!!!!!!......!!!!!!!!!!........!!!!...!!!!!!....

If anyone remembers I had this big twisted crush thing on guitarist BILLY MARTIN and I think I might be seeing a revival here....if...we get to go la....big, prominent IF...

...they say, AAAAAH...AAAAAH....KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY GIRL! KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY GIRL!!!!

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Ahhh..good times...

I wonder if I'll ever get to have morning walks that look like this anymore...

...what's up with your lupus-ing la. Everyoe gets it, in the harshest of ways, everyone, gets it. They're kicking us out...*cry.

Anyway, today was PhysicsIV, right, and I was in fact, too tired to even be all uptight about it that an hour into the two and a half hour worth of paper I started thinking about things that was worth my time...and all sorts of precious things started to run through my head like one day, I think I want to open a national conservation park for endangered wild animals. I had it thought through a bit and after I graduate from Vet school (Godwillingly), I'll do a couple of years of domestic service, join all sorts of internationally acclaimed environmentalist groups like Greenpeace and maybe even WWF...then once I've set myself a good reputation within that community, I won't be that scared then to go on strikes against serious animal abuse. Like how Thailand marks elephants as livestock rather than an endangered species, parading little despirited calves down the town square prodding wooden sticks up their anuses. Dragging an aged elephant down the highway with a heavy chain tied around the neck to a truck running on high speed. Did you know many newborn Thai elephant calves in captivity are beaten and mentally abused deliberately to kill their self-esteem just so that they dare not disobey they're demonic owners throughout their lifetime-long service in sworn brutality? I once watched a documentary on an African elephant herd and they are very...very passionate creatures. They mourn over a loss of a dead member of the herd by caressing his carcass with their trunks and bellow very agonising cries, carry on travelling in search for a watering hole...and come back the next rainy season to the same spot where the carcass was, now only bones and dust, and relive their mourning ritual...again.

How can anyone ever think of even ashaming these majestic creatures.

I want the Malaysian Government to reinforce the law on animal abuse. Fining for murder is an injustification. I'm not expecting a mandatory life sentence, but at least 2 months in a cell and another two for community service...as a zookeeper or something. And no discrimination. Who bloody cares if you're a bigshot, someone needs to be the one who can amplify these God's creations' screams for salvation for the world to hear because obviously everyone's playing deaf...or just plain stupid.

And at the end of that very detailed thought...I realised I still had a quarter of the paper left unanswered. And my mind went blank to all the questions, and suddenly I didn't see any significance of aaaaalll the tacky formulae I memorised anymore. Oy...

Lol. So as of today, I think it marked my very last glance of Physics, the subject, for as long as eternity reigns...=)

I might be coming back to Ipoh later than I thought. Probably next Friday because Aliya has her birthday party the night before, can't miss it. But since the college's banishing us out of sight will have to stay elsewhere...X)

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Lunch at Nandos...self indulgence in petty...petty time-spending. Because there'll definitely be less of these after Friday...

...bunny nadiah enjoying her RABBIT FEED. When her dish arrived it came like strips of godknowswhat on a platter of leeeeeeeaves.

.......i so love seeing my bunnilicious friend eat....XD

PASUM HAS SEEN THE GREATEST MONTHS OF MY LIFE. AND YESTERDAY IT OFFICIALLY CAME TO AN END...

CENTRE FOR THE FOUNDATION STUDIES OF SCIENCE 30TH ANNIVERSARY FORMAL DINNER

(i need a proper digi-cam...7 megapixels shock proof im sick of getting cool pictures all fuzzy with the phone!!!)

.....everyone was dressed so nicely. Even the ones you thought would never bother to. The guys that I thought were never hot enough looked smart in suits and tuxes...

600 odd 06-07 asascians with 500 more from the alumni including the Deputy Minister of Health.

VIPs were welcomed with some silat exhibition...kikndaf cool. Reminded me of you, person who always tags as 'L' on my tagboard!...haha

...almost all the girls

Table 95 leader, Athir lead prayer and merasmikan the dining...er..ritual..hahah

...and then Moony there in blue got all impatient and greedy!!!

...tut tut tut...

...my favouritest roomate, Naya...

...with Oje

...gonna miss the trio...

Naya's bootie...Drill, Nadiah, moi.

Tika-boo all fuzzy, me, Mak Farrina in gold, Dee in blue, Naya in white, Drill in navy

Class z1's perfect quadruplet...with Drill, Syarifah, Dalila

Zara baby...

One of the nicest guy I've ever met ever...Kimie...

Budak Amirul.....I don't know what he was so happy about...lol. Gonna miss this annoying diwmwit also...=(

The ultimate trio...Aimi, Drill, Tasnim...

Aaaaaaaaaahhhh this reeks. But I can make out myself, Tikaboo, and Aliya on a high...haha

Athir makes me look like an ELF..........................

Miza...

Shahira...

Moony-rah!...her mum, our organic chem lecturer, was also my dad's Chem tutor 1980's batch...X)

...Syarifah and Panjang...top-secret couple...I wasn't allowed to take a proper picture of them....and I just realised that idk who on the right is in 2 of my photos........

Baby...I liked this picture, too bad it didnt turn out good...

Big happy family...and extended family...here we go now, from the left>>>
Oje, Dee, Atiq, Tikaboo, Baby at the back, Shira in the middle, Aimi up front, Tasnim at the back, straight-haired Zaty in the middle, Naya in pink up front, Nadiah in black tudung at the back, Mak Farrina in creamy gold in the middle, Erare in gold tie, Drill in white tudung, Elana in blue cheongsam, Zaid in white suit...

...........................Malam Emas was brilliant. I am on a hunt for better pictures from people, will post them up later. There was A LOT MORE CAMWHORING I swear.....After we finished eating all we did was take fifty thousand pictures with just about anybody. I EVEN GOT TO TAKE PICTURES WITH MR. O!!!!!!!! Super happy. We left the building after the ocassion and I screamed at Tasnim "GOD IS GREAT....MY DREAM HAS COME TRUUUUUUEEEE!!!!....well good enough la, at least." XD. It wasn't like I asked for it. Mr. O came up to us and requested for a photo....or a few more like, and then random people started to take a picture of us one after another....even the professional events photographer! I stood next to Mr. for a good 10 minutes!...It was magical. I'm not obsessed. Just overwhelmed ;P...

After the event the girls and I walked all the way to Hotel Legend for the night. All 11 of us. In the middle of the night we felt like going mamak-ing and drove all the way to Pelita KLCC at 3 am. Came back to the room all cuddled up in front of the tv watching Spice World on video...

The next morning some of us were bored waiting for the others to get up so.....we toured the hotel taking many...many pictures and this is just one...

...in the lift.

...vanity fair.

So our program ended....and I'm still not taking it kindly. I doubt anyone is. Leaving eas a complete tragedy. By the last day at college, things just didn't feel right anymore. The collge grounds lost its spunk and life. It was so....quiet...

cafeteria...

The place where I won futsal....

Girls blocks...

...my room on the left....

Didn't take that many pictures of my residential college. Not much time that morning before my dadday pickef me up and then I left 11th College UM for good....=(

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I WENT TO SEE MY LOVE BILLY MARTIN AND HIS CREW, GOOD CHARLOTTE AT MTV LIVE THE OTHER DAY WILL POST MANY, MANY PICTURES LATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I tend to do stupid things when I’m left on my own.

Back at college once, I was alone in the room, and a can of
lychees in syrup intrigued me so. Unequipped with the best of
kitchen utensils, I only had at best, the aid of a small knife to
heave the can open…and when almost half of the top was bent
open, I decided to speed things up and pressed on the edges to
bend it further so I could reach my sweet, sweet lychees better…
…and pierced my thumb good. It was bleeding richly.

The other day, Dad left me alone at the hotel. He also left me
(God knows what had gotten into him then) the car keys and the
parking pass before he left for work. It was my first day away
from college and I couldn’t stand the ultimate boredom, and
despite not having the chance yet to drive alone in IPOH for
God’s sakes, I decided to take the car for a lone
stroll around PJ…..and got lost
proper.

And so these days yet again I find myself tending to my own
reconciliation behind closed doors, picking a fight with all this
clutter that I brought home with me from KL still all over the
place. The sooner they’re put away the faster I can move on
completely. My clutter aren’t always flattering. I have a bad
habit of wanting to keep everything…thinking that one day I
might be needing them when it doesn’t always turn out that
way …used ribbons, charred remains of gift papers, fancy
chocolate wrappers…a load of rubbish, literally. It all probably
resembles my brain. Dear God I think it so does…

I like sticking things onto my walls. That’s why I keep a packet of
blutack in handy. I like the thought of having odd things on my
pretty turquoise wall. My black suede boots…bags …I like the
thought of rushing into a day out grabbing everything I’ll be
needing from the wall….obviously blutack won’t do enough. Lol.

A character needs to be expressed.

…………………..

I am also suffering from a flu-possessed fever. It’s a dead
annoying one. Not the kind you’d be willing to sleep-off hoping
to wake up aqua-fresh the next day. I have been wasting trees
and destroying my nose. The flaky skin tells that it’s been corroded
by the ten thousand blows into pieces of not-as-gentle-as-I-
thought Kleenex. IT’S SOOOOOO ANNOYING OKAY. It’s the cats’
doing. I think I’m allergic to Basil. She needs to be groomed. And
she’s my favourite to squeeze. I can’t believe I’m actually allergic to cats……….

Talking about trees and cats…..GUESS WHO my favourite vegan
up to date is?!.....

...my painful addiction , William (Billy) Dean Martin.

- guitarist

- keyboardist

- artist

- designer

- devoted animal-lover, very active in PETA (People for the
Ethical Treatment of Animals), commited vegan who also
succeeded in persuading fellow bandmates Joel and Benji
Madden to become vegetarians...

Whenever people asked me, "Why a veterinarian of all professions?..."

I would answer, "There are thousands of kids out there some of
which are my own friends, who'd kill to be doctors ...so who are
going to tend to the animals? Someone's got to do it..."

I'll let the sweetheart speak for himself...

...and then I noticed he quoted me. Meant to be?... You bet,
Jon Doyou. Him being an animal person is the ultimate reason you
cannot discriminate him for.....go me =).

I shall refrain from gushing more about my Billy, most of you have
endured enough, haha.

...but on my babysteps to becoming a vegetarian...I suppose one
day when I have a more disciplined lifestyle, proper routines and
everything I suppose...it can be accomplished....becoming a
complete vegan however... means I'm gonna have to throw out
my leather Nikes, my Coach soho...which by the way is made out
of F*cKIN' CALF LEATHER...I didn't buy it, it was a gift so I suppose
that made me feel a wee better...

God said we can eat certain types of animals and to care for
wildlife alike at the same time so I guess, respecting the place
where animals rightfully stand in our lives would suffice...I still despise
animal-abusers or those who mock them in the simplest of ways
such as cringing at roadkills without the slightest sense of sympathy...
this, I assure you, is not just for Billy.

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Pictures from the gig....not from my phone so explains the quality.
Some person's I found online. OKAY YEAH WHATEVER YOU'VE GOT
BETTER PICTURES AT LEAST I WAS STANDING WAY CLOSER TO THE
STAGE....hahah, I'm spiteful...X)